Males can use the mail to express love on Valentine’s Day
Ten days from now, men all over the country will scramble to
find something suitable to express their love for their significant
other. Valentine’s Day
– sweet, dreaded Valentine’s Day – is the most pressure-packed
day of the year for many of my gender.
Not only do we have to come up with something that appropriately
indicates our feelings for the lady in our life, but we have to
pick something that doesn’t look like we got it 10 minutes before
at the local grocery store. Not that any of us would do that.
Males can use the mail to express love on Valentine’s Day
Ten days from now, men all over the country will scramble to find something suitable to express their love for their significant other. Valentine’s Day – sweet, dreaded Valentine’s Day – is the most pressure-packed day of the year for many of my gender.
Not only do we have to come up with something that appropriately indicates our feelings for the lady in our life, but we have to pick something that doesn’t look like we got it 10 minutes before at the local grocery store. Not that any of us would do that.
Valentine’s Day was easy when we were younger. Our parents would buy us a bunch of cards, we’d pass them out in class, and if we liked someone in particular we’d personalize the card or give them one of those candy hearts with a message on it.
Trouble was, sometimes someone we didn’t like would receive the candy heart with the “Be my sweetie” message and get the wrong idea. And maybe I got the wrong idea a time or two as well.
As we get older and begin courting for real, Feb. 14 becomes a day where we have to buy not just a card but some flowers, or maybe a box of chocolates, or even jewelry. And then make dinner reservations.
At least that’s what the expectations are.
For those of us who have been in a relationship for nearly 20 years, the expectations are a bit different. The day still scares me.
I want to show my wife how much she means to me and how she’s still “my valentine” and all that lovey-dovey stuff. But she’s not going to want a box of chocolates on a day when she’s doing circuit training at the gym.
A card might be OK, but it’s not very personal unless it’s homemade. But then a homemade card might look too cheap.
I could get flowers, but those die and my wife wouldn’t want me spending 50 bucks on something she’ll have to throw away in three days. I could get a plant, but that wouldn’t be as romantic as flowers.
The U.S. Postal Service offered to help in a fax sent to the newspaper office. As if sending mail wasn’t outdated enough, they are still sending story ideas by fax.
Anyway, the USPS is suggesting that instead of just sending a greeting card to express my sentiments of love, I could have a special postmark applied to the card’s envelope “to make my missive memorable.”
Post offices around the country with love-themed names are offering special postmarks for Valentine’s Day “that will make the envelope just as much of a treasured keepsake as its contents.” The catch is that it has to be mailed before Saturday to allow enough time to be postmarked, re-mailed and delivered by Feb. 14.
So if I want to be real romantic, I’ve got to rush to the store, pick a card, stamp it, address it, put it in a larger envelope of box and mail it to the postmaster of the love-themed city like Eros, La. or Loveville, Md. Would my wife appreciate the card more if it were stamped from Kissimmee, Fla. or Romance, Ark.? Or would she wonder why I was in Florida or Arkansas mailing her a card?
There’s Honeyville, Utah; Romeo, Mich.; and Juliette, Ga. to choose from. And super-sweet places like Honey Brook, Pa.; Honeyville, Utah; and Honey Creek, Wisc.
To be honest, I don’t plan to mail my wife a card with a romantic postmark. I already wrote about it, which has ruined any chance of surprise, and what more romantic place is there than Hollister, Calif.?
It’s where we got married; where we’ve lived our entire married lives; where our children were born; where our love blossomed. Yes, it might be romantic to send her a card postmarked from Loves Park, Ill. or Heart Butte, Mont. (maybe not that one), but I’ll stick with our hometown – where our hearts really are.
Adam Breen writes a blog at http://thebreenblog.blogspot.com and teaches newspaper and yearbook classes at San Benito High School. He is a reporter for The Pinnacle and former editor of The Free Lance.
