Pay a visit to Oscar and Bob
When Marlon Brando’s son died a few weeks ago, it reminded me of
the time his son came to my video store in Hollister with a mutual
friend who had just been featured in the Enquirer newsrag. He came
by to personally give me a gift.
Pay a visit to Oscar and Bob
When Marlon Brando’s son died a few weeks ago, it reminded me of the time his son came to my video store in Hollister with a mutual friend who had just been featured in the Enquirer newsrag. He came by to personally give me a gift.
Remember “In Living Color,” the breakthrough black television comedy that featured the Wayan brothers, Jim Carrey and Jennifer Lopez, all before any of them were super famous? They had a skit with Detective Head with a Wayan brother head superimposed over just a pair of feet. The prop used for “rolling” sequences was so realistic and funky he knew it would have a perfect home in my somewhat psycho-looking shop. I took it home to do some touch-up and placed Det. Head in my garage.
The next morning half of the Hollister police department and reserves were scaling my fence as they had received a call that the body of a black man was in my garage. The police seemed disappointed that they couldn’t arrest me. At that time half of the force was supporting my column on a scandal at the top while half were supporting the police brass. Some cops who feared for my life even gave me a bullet-proof vest to wear. Which was great if all I had to protect were my perfect 36C man breasts. Aye chee waa waa.
The 80th Oscar awards will be held a couple of blocks from where I live and if you’re in Hollywood before that you should be sure to visit the Oscar exhibit at the Hollywood and Highland Complex, the home of the Kodak Theater. You can view for free many Oscars and even hold one and have your picture taken giving your acceptance speech. When you come to Hollywood try to take the Highland exit, go a few blocks past Franklin and make a right at Hollywood Boulevard and go past the famed Kodak Theater and take a right at the Grauman’s Chinese Theater. Make another right and park at the Hollywood Highland indoor parking lot and it will cost you only $2 with validation.
If you plan to spend the night and can’t find a room be sure to call Nancy and me and we will put you and the family up for the night. If there is anything we love more than family it is having overnight guests dropping in. We live just a few blocks from the Oscar Theater. Make a right at Orange, a left at Hollywood Boulevard, ask Guido in the phone booth on Hollywood and Sunset and he will point right to our place. Can’s miss it as we brought a little bit of Hollister to Hollywood. An old ’52 Chevy pickup on blocks with empty beer cans on the lawn. The tailgate is missing from the pickup so don’t expect a tailgate party but you will notice a rusty Weber barbecue straddling the chalk outlines of bodies. Not to worry; they are really old as you will notice one still has an afro.
That reminds me of why Obama will lose to Hillary. The large Latino vote in most large cities will not vote for a black. Like in most communities, blacks and Latinos are deadly enemies. Christ himself could be black and the Hispanics wouldn’t vote for him. What? He was! Aye chee waa waa.
Confidential to C.C. of Hollister: It is because he knocks off 7-Elevens that I admire him. Do you honestly think be brings home that kind of money with the job he has? And what about all those Slurpees?
Reason No. 69 why Hollister is superior to Gilroy: all you have to do is look at the mug shots of the Hollister Fifty Cent Lance’s sports editor Andrew Matheson and the Gilroy Dispatch counterpart Josh Koehn. The Hollister sports editor looks like a sports editor – a couple days facial growth, no tie and a look that says “I dare you.” The Gilroy sports editor looks like a model for Brooks Brothers, clean shaven and wearing a tie, not even a clip-on. There’s no wearing ties on a real sports desk.
But the Pinnacle still has the only real sports editor around. Look at John Bagley’s mug. Hell, he looks like he just spent a night carousing with Babe Ruth in every beer joint in town, smoking stogies and pinching bar wenches on the butt. Getting to bed around 4 a.m. and then getting up in a couple of hours and writing one of the best sports columns in the nation. His column of Jan. 25 in the Pinnacle is one of the truly great examples of sports reporting ever. And his defense of Joe Montana is so logical I don’t even know why anyone would ever question who is the greatest quarterback ever.
Sorry to hear that after my rave about Las Palmas Mexican restaurant on San Benito Street in Hollister between Fourth and Fifth that it’s up for sale. Here’s a clue to the next owner: don’t change a thing. And, yes, I still stand by my column that Hollister and San Juan have more Mexican restaurants than Mexico City. It is a fact. Look that up in your Funk and Wagnell’s. Aye chee waa waa.
And who did those two women from Hollister think they were fooling with their wicked ways on Hollywood and Vine? More next week but for now all this geriatric Spiderman will tell you is their initials are D.T. and A.S. Wicked, wicked, wicked.
