This letter is for all the children and parents who have gone
through any traumatic and negative experience in sports, drama,
music or anything that has to do with a children’s group activity
and adults in charge that maybe shouldn’t be.
This letter is for all the children and parents who have gone through any traumatic and negative experience in sports, drama, music or anything that has to do with a children’s group activity and adults in charge that maybe shouldn’t be.
Well folks, it’s another season out at Vets Park for baseball, and already the problems have started. Last Thursday, we went out there for my grandson’s game in the sprinkling rain, and by the third inning the game was called, thank goodness. While we were waiting for the boys to come out of the dugout, the coach came out by the backstop and yelled for my daughter to “come get her kid out of the dugout.” Needless to say, just hearing the way he said it, was upsetting, so I went with her. When we reached the dugout, the boys were pushing, hitting and taunting my grandson as the coach yelled, once again, that his mom was there and to get out of the dugout. The boy was almost in tears as he was humiliated out of the dugout.
Now mind you, this is Little League and only the second game of the season! As he was being pushed and shoved all the way out of the dugout, the coach continued to talk to the team. My daughter was so upset, and when I saw that scene, I went down into the dugout, being the coach had no intention of coming to us, to ask the coach what the problem was and if there was one reason why didn’t he come out to talk to the parents and handle it then, instead of embarrassing this boy in front of the team all the way out of the dugout.
The problem for him was that the boy was eating in the dugout and didn’t listen, and that was enough for him. He didn’t mention that his own son and the other coaches’ son were the ones who had the popcorn and candy that they were hiding in the dugout. My daughter was holding her son’s popcorn in her hand during the game. I’m sorry, but at 10 years old, as with almost any age, there will be times when kids do things like that. Not to say what the boy did was right or that he did it at all, but any complaint that the coach had should have been directed to the parents to correct the boy. He didn’t ever give the parents a chance. He just kicked him out of the dugout. I asked him if he was still talking to the team, and if so why wasn’t my grandson included in the team talk. If there was a problem, why not voice the problem to all the boys to make sure that all the boys know that there was no eating in the dugout and to listen to him? Why not set consequences for that behavior, like taking laps or sitting out an inning, even though this boy isn’t put in the game until maybe the last three innings if he’s lucky.
I know the rules about parents not being in the dugout and that’s during the game. The game was over, and I wanted some answers to this man’s behavior and, in turn, condoning the boys’ behavior toward this one boy.
This is the kind of experience that ruins the passion that a child might have for any sport, and it happens all the time in this town. These coaches treat their own experience as coaches as if they’re in the pros and don’t comprehend that some of these children are new to the sport and some are experienced. As a coach, you have to take all of that into consideration, as well as personalities and treat all your players at least fairly. As a parent coaching your own child, learn to recognize when they should sit out an inning or two because of their behavior.
Well, we went through the chain of command to talk about this and file a complaint, and we were told the parents would be contacted on Friday. They have to talk to the coach and get his side of the story and figure out what to do with this one boy. So, what do you think? Will they put the boy on another team? It’s the majors, and he supposedly is stuck on that team until the age of 12. So, probably not. Will they give the parents back their money just to get them out, shut them up and be done with the problem? Probably. Even though this boy wants to play baseball, they have the power to say, you are out! Where else can he play ball if not in his own community … out of town? Why should that happen? Either the coach is relieved of his position or on probation and the boys on the team are lectured about unsportsmanlike conduct or this boy needs to be moved to another team. Without the coaches’ and the parents’ help in teaching the children how to “treat others as you would like to be treated,” we all lose.
Remember this: “The most unforgettable thing a teacher can do is ridicule a student in front of a class. Such has been the finding in numerous surveys of both youngsters and grown-ups. Those surveyed say they’ll ‘never forget.’ ”
That is something out of Ann Landers, and it appropriately pertains to any adult that has anything to do with children’s activities, including sports. And remember, we all have Karma, good and bad, and it all comes back to us one way or another.
Oh, and by the way, the answer is: If he wants to play ball, he stays on the team and be tortured or here’s your money back, so says the board! What kind of people would subject a child to that kind of treatment and expect him to want to stay? So, he’s out.
Rose Ortiz,
Hollister