Proposition 8 would take away the right of same-sex couples to
marry
Shannon Patrick and Anela Tyler have known each other since
middle school, but it was years later that they fell in love. They
married Aug. 21, the anniversary of their domestic partnership.
”
We knew each other in high school, but we were never
friends,
”
Tyler said.
Proposition 8 would take away the right of same-sex couples to marry
Shannon Patrick and Anela Tyler have known each other since middle school, but it was years later that they fell in love. They married Aug. 21, the anniversary of their domestic partnership.
“We knew each other in high school, but we were never friends,” Tyler said.
For Tyler, the grudge began in middle school when Patrick won first trumpet in the school band, a position which had been Tyler’s.
“So, I just carried it all through high school,” Tyler said. “I just didn’t like Shannon Patrick.”
That changed when the two met at work several years ago, Tyler said. They were friends for a year before Patrick came out of the closet.
“I had such a crush on her,” Tyler said. “I am Shannon’s first, last and only. I’ve been out since I was 17 and Shannon did not come out of the closet until I met her.”
The two are anxiously awaiting the results of Proposition 8, an initiative that would eliminate the right of same-sex couples to marry by overturning a California court ruling and amending the California constitution.
“Right now we’re considered married in the state of California,” Tyler said. “If Prop. 8 passes, there’s nothing we can do. It can be taken away and we have no say in the matter.”
In 2003, the Supreme Court of Massachusetts made gay marriage legal in the state, said Carisa Cunningham, director of public affairs for Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders (GLAD), and the ruling there has also been challenged.
There were many attempts to overturn the ruling, including lawsuits and constitutional amendments, Cunningham said.
But in Massachusetts before a constitutional amendment can qualify for the ballot, it must first be passed in a special session of the legislature in two consecutive sessions.
“It never made it to the ballot,” Cunningham said.
An unimaginable wedding
Tyler never thought she would see her wedding day.
“I honestly thought I’d never see the day when I could get married, but it’s scary because it might get taken away,” Tyler said “I would be heartbroken. I would be absolutely heartbroken about my marriage and me not having equal rights. I wish people would just leave us alone and let us be.”
Originally from Santa Clara County, the couple now lives in San Benito. Tyler, 26, works as a teleservice representative for the Social Security Administration. She smiles often, especially when she talks about Patrick.
She and Patrick have been together for five years.
“When I met Shannon back in March of ’03, she had walked in on a conversation with me telling people that I’m not happy because I’ll never be able to get married,” Tyler said. “And now of all people, I’m married to her.”
A Gilroy native, 28-year-old Patrick is the director of event technology at a Monterey County business. Patrick has short blond hair gelled into spikes and bright blue-green eyes.
Since June 17, when gay marriage became legal in California, eight same-sex couples took out marriage licenses in the county, according to documents from the San Benito County Clerk.
A change in voter perception
The California Supreme Court ruling overturned a ban on gay marriage established by voters in 2000 through Proposition 22, a ballot initiative that limited marriage to one man and one woman.
It was passed by 61 percent of voters statewide, according to documents from the California Secretary of State. San Benito County voters passed the initiative by 62 percent.
In a field poll taken in September, about 38 percent of voters supported Proposition 8, according to the Associated Press.
Members of Grace Bible Church in Hollister do not support same-sex marriage, said Duane Cashion, interim senior pastor for Grace.
“Our church would agree that marriage is a union between a man and a woman,” Cashion said. “We have addressed it in the past.”
They are not advocating for the measure, Cashion said.
“We don’t use our pulpit for preaching issues, even though this is a moral issue,” Cashion said.
For Patrick and Tyler, they said they enjoy being able to say they are married.
“To me, [marriage] is not very different from the legal paperwork that we had,” Patrick said. “The rights are very similar to domestic partnerships. It’s more so the title. Now, we’re not domestic partners – we’re married.”
Still, Patrick’s parents do not support their marriage, which creates potential problems.
The couple have filed wills and other documentation so that their partner can inherit assets or make health care decisions on the other’s behalf and so that Patrick’s parents cannot intervene.
The wedding was a last minute decision, Patrick said.
“I guess it was my romantic gesture,” Patrick said. “We actually didn’t decide until two or three days before our anniversary. She had a good argument, ‘Let’s do it while we can, and if it gets overturned in November, we’ll worry about that then.'”
August Jewison, a 33-year-old San Benito County resident, decided years ago to marry Kerrie Fleshman, her partner of a decade, whenever it became legal.
“We went through our commitment ceremony about five years ago,” Jewison said. “She said, ‘Well, if it ever becomes legal, let’s get married.’ It became legal, so we got married.”
A manufacturing planner at an aerospace and defense company, Jewison always knew that she would get married one day.
“I knew there was somebody out there I was going to marry and spend the rest of my life with,” Jewison said. “The moment I looked in my wife’s eyes and we met on the beach that was it. That was my soul mate and that’s where I’m going to be for the rest of my life.”
Her faith that society would one day accept her choice of a partner is due to her grandmother’s influence, Jewison said.
“She was a southern woman from Kentucky and she was the most gentile, genuine woman you can imagine,” Jewison said. “She said, ‘Honey, right now it might not be legal, but one day, within your lifetime, it will be legal. One day you will be able to live with, love and marry whoever you want.’ And from that day, that’s always been my belief.”
Jewison was 10 years old at the time.
“Proposition 8 passes, I swear to god that I will sue the state of California,” Jewison said. “What gives them the right to tell me whether or not I can actually go into a legal, binding, life contract with someone? That’s my choice.”
It is not fair, Tyler said.
“The constitution is supposed to be here for us, to protect the people,” Tyler said. “If Proposition 8 passes, then they’re going to use the constitution against us.”
