Pity poor Magenta Hughes, a lovely young maiden desperate for a
husband, terrified of becoming an old maid, fishing for a man,
using a taste of ale in a silver cup as bait.
Casa de Fruta – Pity poor Magenta Hughes, a lovely young maiden desperate for a husband, terrified of becoming an old maid, fishing for a man, using a taste of ale in a silver cup as bait.
“I will make a wonderful wife,” she declared. “I will only drink a little of his ale and I will only spit in it if he do deserve it. I will only nag twice a day. Once, in the morning to the evening, and once in the evening, ’til the morning.”
But Magenta could find no takers, for she desired commitment, and a quiet life at home. At the opening weekend of the 2005 Northern California Renaissance Faire, ribaldry, bawdiness and passion were in demand.
This year’s faire kicked off with a “Weekend of Romance and Revelry,” a celebration that was part medieval fantasy and part Mardi Gras.
“It’s the Renaissance Faire, romance is always in the air,” said Wendy Braun, a beer wench from Long Beach who wears a cord around her neck. From the cord hangs a wooden sign in which “Availabull” is carved into one side and “Smile if you want me” on the other.
Last Saturday, romance was inescapable, with the Wenches’ Matchmaking Game, the Couple’s Stroll and Her Majesty’s Romantic Scavenger Hunt, which required grown-up contestants to get a passion’s purpura (a love bite) and perform the “canine courting ritual.” There were also prizes for couples who engaged in public displays of affection.
“We didn’t advertise that because we didn’t want couples standing around, making out for a bag full of coins,” said Michael Gardner, who lives in Hollister and is one of the faire’s organizers. “But if we see two people having a really good time together, we’re going to give them some coins.”
The slightly risque tone of the opening weekend was part of a larger effort to draw a younger audience to the faire, which may have to fold if it can’t improve dramatically upon last year’s attendance of 40,000. The first day was promising. The weather was perfect and everyone said the crowd seemed bigger than last year, when it rained. There will be a different theme on each of the faire’s six weekends. Saturday, pirates take center stage.
But, the opening weekend was all about love, and before the faire was two hours old, performers were trying to pair up singles. Bridget Leonard, of Morgan Hill, and Gilroy’s Tina Elder, two regular faire attendees who arrived in costume, complete with horns, were forced to spend the day with a young Mountain View man at his first faire. The date didn’t last very long.
“We ditched him. He was about as exciting as watching paint peel,” Elder said. “We stayed with him for two painful hours. We should of hung out with his dad. His dad was a lot of fun.”
Greg Haas, a North Bay man who was dragging around a girlfriend, and a mistress, was having better luck. Lori Meyer and Jan Wyld, whom he won in battle, were chained to Haas with leather handcuffs and were all too willing to be his slaves.
“I’m sure he was looking forward to some shillings, but it was us instead,” Wyld said. “He’s such a fine Scot we’re willing to go with him because we think our life will be better.”
Kim and Debra Gong were celebrating their seventh wedding anniversary, returning from Merced to the faire where they spent their honeymoon.
“It’s so romantic,” Kim Gong said. “Plus, I love to be called ‘me lord’ and I love calling her ‘my wench.’ ”
After searching for two hours for the perfect outfit for Debra – it was red and black with gossamer butterfly wings – the couple participated in the scavenger hunt, where Kim Gong got a lusty kiss on the cheek from a ruby-lipped maiden and their team was cited for “public nudity or lack of it.”
That was all just to much for Abstinence Stipple, a Puritan railing against the licentiousness of the faire, though evidence of his own romantic encounters were visible on either cheek.
“I’m disgusted by all this bawdiness and revelry,” Stipple said. “There are only a few of us but we are mighty in our holiness and righteousness. We’re here to see that every person leads a holy life whether they want to or not.”
Aside from Stipple, not much holiness was to be found at a party heralding the flesh and the spirit.
“We take some artistic license, much to my pleasure” Gardner said of the celebration of medieval life that stresses the sexual mythology of the end of the Dark Ages at the expense of the true rigidity of Elizabethan society. Queen Elizabeth herself was known to appear bare-breasted, but the preened and decorated cleavage to be found everywhere at the faire wasn’t seen so often in the typical 16th Century English village.
Though breasts could be displayed, showing an ankle was not tolerated. The Middle Ages was no time for a leg man.
“Looking back at the beginning of the reformation of the Church of England, there were a lot of interesting rules,” Gardner said. “There was a mish-mash of new social rules and religious rules. Some things they were very strict about.”
But the faire is fantasy, a sexy outfit and ribald tale of romance. Six weekends a year when there are not many rules.
“I’ll loan the sign out to other people, but they have to come back with stories,” said beer wench Braun. “That sign has had a lot more exciting life than I’ve had.”
