Get rich quick! Become a cop
Was that San Benito County District Attorney Candace Hooper
serving Sheriff Curtis Hill with papers? What? The D.A. was
probably just submitting her job application to become a San Benito
County sheriff’s deputy. Why not? Last year even the deputy who
left in disgrace made more money with overtime than the district
attorney. They say crime doesn’t pay. It does if you live in
Hollister. In Hollister it really pays.
Get rich quick! Become a cop
Was that San Benito County District Attorney Candace Hooper serving Sheriff Curtis Hill with papers? What? The D.A. was probably just submitting her job application to become a San Benito County sheriff’s deputy. Why not? Last year even the deputy who left in disgrace made more money with overtime than the district attorney. They say crime doesn’t pay. It does if you live in Hollister. In Hollister it really pays.
I love it when Hollister newspapers including the Pinnacle keep the myth alive that the Hollister High Haybalers were named after San Benito County once being the hay capital of the world. Even Sports Illustrated repeated the story. The fact is that when Hollister High suited up its first football team it was composed of mostly one huge black family that later moved on to Oakland. When the Bailer kids ran out on the field everyone yelled, “Hey Bailers!”
I love December in Hollywood. On Christmas Eve I was eating Bing cherries in 73-degree weather while Nancy was getting herself all pretty for our 49th wedding anniversary celebration. She is still the only woman I know who only needs five seconds to look gorgeous. She is, if that is possible, even more beautiful than 49 years ago when we exchanged our vows in the Methodist Church when it was still covered with ivy, making it the most beautiful church in the world with Nancy the most beautiful woman in the world saying “I do” to the most handsome guy in the world. Not only is Nancy beautiful but damned lucky, too. Aye chee waa waa.
School administrations sell their souls when they accept advertisements or kickbacks to push brand name products on students. Then they act shocked and surprised when companies want something in return. Greatest acting ever and the Academy Award should go to Principal Numbknutz and the school board who didn’t know when they signed up with McDonalds, Pepsi or fill in the blank ______ that the students would actually be influenced by product placement or signage. Of course they didn’t. Our health course today is being sponsored by McDonalds. Aye chee waa waa.
But I do love the huge lawsuit on the death of a patient because of lack of care from an HMO. That big shot celebrity lawyer says “We will prove that the hospital is more concerned with profits than patients.” I was shocked. Reminds me of last week’s column when I wrote about the boxer from Hollister who finally figured out that there might be cheating in the boxing game. Aye chee waa waa.
“Juno,” a movie that has been playing in Hollywood for over a month, is being hyped as another “Waitress” or “Little Miss Sunshine” and while it is excellent for teens, it was just a little too contrived for me as though a set of writers were just off camera coming up with lines as the film rolled. I did love that the adults in the film were not played as the usual jerks or villains but like most parents who love their children no matter the predicament and mostly try to come up with the best possible solution despite Hollywood trying to paint parents perhaps as maybe how the writers in Tinseltown parent. Actor J.K. Simmons should be nominated for an Oscar as the father. Being a father he is right on. Simmons also plays the top cop on that great show on television, The Closer.
Won’t be seeing “Sweeny Todd” despite that Johnny Depp is one of my favorite actors and Tim Burton one of the best directors. Nancy and I walked out of the Broadway play and it starred the Tony Award-winning Angela Lansbury. I don’t like movies or plays that justify slitting people’s throats with glee in the name of entertainment. It amazes me how most critics denounce teen slasher films from B studios with Z casts but love big studios with name casts doing exactly the same thing. This, to me, is real pornography. But Bob! It’s a musical!
The far left Lost Angeles Times has been sold again, but there might be some hope this time. Even though it was a small story they actually wrote something that didn’t flatter the Democrats. “Democrats took the Hill but are stymied by steadfast president.” Aye chee waa waa! Was that Rosie O’Donnell just canceling her subscription?
Next week: Why Sheriff Hill and three of his top deputies should resign but will probably get a raise if Supervisor Jaime De La Cruz has his say. As for me, I’m just happy they don’t pay me what I’m worth. And yes, I noticed they put my mug near the headline, “Give thanks for the turkey.”
