Davis’ retro look reflected in a Shell game
Al Davis lives in the past. No Da.
How else do you explain the trademarked disco-like jumpsuit, the
Italian horn gold chain, the Roy Orbison sunglasses and the Elvis
hair?
Davis’ retro look reflected in a Shell game
Al Davis lives in the past. No Da.
How else do you explain the trademarked disco-like jumpsuit, the Italian horn gold chain, the Roy Orbison sunglasses and the Elvis hair?
And not only does he dress in the past, he thinks in the past, too, which is why old Al opted to play the Shell game again last weekend with the rehiring of the 59-year-old Hall of Famer and Raider legend Art Shell to fill the organizations head coaching vacancy.
But why hire Shell?
It’s like Al is permanently stuck in 1976. Only now it’s 1976 on Viagra. Speaking of 76, that’s how old Mr. Davis will be this year.
The only thing better than hiring Art Shell on the sidelines to regain that winning tradition, history and commitment to excellence hogwash lingo would have been if Al himself took it a step further and opted to coach from the sidelines in a golf cart.
Could you just imagine the Saturday Night Live skits for that? That would have been the ultimate.
It would be funny but he would also learn that the game has evolved a bit since the disco decade. It could have happened if Art had said no to the job. The Raiders front office was running out of hiring ideas and were struggling to get anyone to fill the void –it is common knowledge that all Raider head coaches are just puppets of the puppet master himself.
Remember, any coach who goes to Oakland with too much creativity or assertiveness is sent to the Black Hole with his pink slip. Just ask Jon Gruden.
But Art graciously accepted. So it’s all good – for now. Who knows? Art might do well. He took them to the playoffs before and he’ll certainly be better than Norv, but why continuing clinging to the past, Al? Why not hire a guy who will pave a new future instead of rehiring a guy who personifies the past?
In the fall the Raiders will have the Hall of Fame coach on the sidelines calling plays with the team’s Hall of Fame owner scrutinizing the Shell game on every down.
In keeping with Davis’ decision, maybe the next move should be to bring back the old Hall of Famers, give them a little Geritol and send them out on the field.
Or maybe, so it’s not as noticeable, just pull out the old jerseys and place them on backs of the current players so that Al can look down on the field from his luxury sky box and smile, thinking that he’s watching Ken Stabler, Fred Biletnikoff, Lester Hayes, Jim Otto and Ray Guy.
Better yet, Shell could play too. And he could send the plays in himself – as a starter on the offensive line. The only player/coach in the NFL! Or John Madden could coach the team on certain days when Shell wanted to play.
Sound senile?
Maybe it is.
