Unlike driving a car or getting into college, you don’t need to
take a test to be a parent. But a little education about the
topic
– from how to talk to your children to establishing mutual trust
and respect – never hurts, according to the San Benito County
Prevention Coalition.
Hollister – Unlike driving a car or getting into college, you don’t need to take a test to be a parent. But a little education about the topic – from how to talk to your children to establishing mutual trust and respect – never hurts, according to the San Benito County Prevention Coalition.
The non-profit organization has been holding parenting classes in the county for approximately four years and is gearing up to do another round of classes at Rancho San Justo in late January.
The objective is to help parents get along with their children so kids don’t get into fights, tune out in class or start using alcohol and drugs.
“We’re there to facilitate communication skills,” said Lupe Maldonado, who has taught many of the parenting classes at elementary schools throughout Hollister.
In the weekly classes, which usually last six weeks, parents are taught how to discipline their children without yelling, motivate them even if they are not doing well in school, and, above all, to understand the unique pressures of growing up in today’s world.
Through their participation in the classes, which incorporate role playing, negotiations and discussions, parents have become aware of why their children misbehave, say members of the coalition.
“Children have basic needs and when those needs are not met, they misbehave,” said Marisa Segovia, a certified parent educator with the group.
One of the biggest needs that kids have is to feel secure in sharing their thoughts with their parents and knowing they won’t be intimidated or ridiculed when they speak up, she said. It also means children are controlled, without being scared into submission and are encouraged to express themselves.
“No one teaches you how to be a parent and most people learn about it from their own parents,” said Bill Jacinto, a counselor at Rancho San Justo Middle School. “And sometimes what they learn isn’t the best.”
Conflicts between parents and children can be especially tense in immigrant families, where parents speak only one language while their kids are much more proficient in English. Children can use the language barrier to exclude their parents from their school activities because they are angry at them, said Segovia.
“If they are overpowered by their parents, they may do things like not want to translate notes sent from school to the parents,” she said.
The classes are paid for by a federal grant from the Office for Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention, which is set to expire at the end of this year. And with so many couples in San Benito County who have children at a young age and live on one salary, the classes are badly needed, said Arlene Boyd, community liaison for the coalition.
“Many parents just don’t know they can do things differently,” she said.
Rancho San Justo will hold a preview night Jan. 20 from 7-8pm. Classes start Jan. 27 and will be held at the school each Thursday evening. For more information, call Rancho San Justo at 636-4450.
Karina Ioffee covers education for the Free Lance. Reach her at (831)637-5566 ext. 335 or
ki*****@fr***********.com
