Mornings are an unwelcome wake-up call for teens
Every weekday morning, I am reminded what a joy I must have been
for my parents during my teenage years.
Nobody likes waking up to a blaring alarm to face the pressure
to get ready, eat and beat the school bell each morning
– particularly teenagers. They are wired to sleep until noon or
until someone forces them to wake up, whichever comes first. They
don’t want to go to sleep at night and they don’t want to wake up
in the morning.
Mornings are an unwelcome wake-up call for teens
Every weekday morning, I am reminded what a joy I must have been for my parents during my teenage years.
Nobody likes waking up to a blaring alarm to face the pressure to get ready, eat and beat the school bell each morning – particularly teenagers. They are wired to sleep until noon or until someone forces them to wake up, whichever comes first. They don’t want to go to sleep at night and they don’t want to wake up in the morning.
When they are roused from sleep, they become what I imagine a slumbering bear must be like when hibernation ends: they are slow to move, they growl and they smell funny.
The routine in our house is that I wake up to a clock radio alarm that goes off twice – at 6:50 and 6:55 a.m. The first buzz jars me and makes me act like Houdini when he was trying to get out of the arm restraints.
With the buzzer sounding and my eyes closed, I try to wriggle free from the tangle of sheets, blankets and comforter in an effort to release my arm and take a swing at the radio’s “off” button. At times I thrash like a fish on a boat dock as I try to stop the cacophony.
Every now and then I get lucky and strike the snooze bar on my first attempt. More often than not, my arm hits my charging cell phone, the lampshade or a television remote, all of which make more noise than the alarm.
Through it all, my teenage boys sleep.
After the second alarm gets me going, I walk to my 13-year-old’s room first, since his school day begins before his brother’s. I turn on the hallway light so that I can see in the winter darkness and nudge him with my hand, letting him know it’s time to get up and get ready.
He grumbles and rolls over as I open the shades in his room. If that still doesn’t stir him, I turn on the overhead light, which makes him react like a cockroach shielding itself from view. His grumbles become groans as I force him to get out of bed, which is easier to do on a day that he looks forward to, such as Friday or a minimum day or the last day before winter break.
From that point forward, he is on autopilot, getting himself dressed and brushed and gelled and fed. As long as he’s staying on pace for our scheduled departure time, I leave him alone as he watches Sports Center with a bowl of cereal on his lap.
By the time we’re leaving to take him to school, his 15-year-old brother has dragged himself down the hallway in a sort of sleepwalk-y way, eyes half shut, clothes rumpled, grumpiness growing.
If one of us parents tries to engage our freshman in conversation first thing in the morning (it doesn’t happen often), we get a response ranging from a muffled harrumph to an irritated “Stop, just stop!”
I remember those days, when any morning conversational attempt by my parents was met with disdain. Teens need time to transition from sleep to lucidity. It is neither a swift nor enjoyable process, and parents are best served recognizing that fact.
The good thing about teen sleeping habits is that on the days when my wife and I want to sleep in, we know there’s no way our boys will get up before us like they did when they were 7.
During the times when my teens’ morning irritation is irritating to me, I decide to irritate them in the worst possible way – through kindness.
“Good morning son! How are you this morning?!” I say.
“Grumble, murmur, growl” they say, sort of.
“Give your old man a hug!” I shoot back, reaching out for the inevitable rejection.
“Daaaaad, stop!”
Then I do, knowing that getting out of the way at times is the best way to “be there” for teenagers. Learning this was a real wake-up call.
Adam Breen writes a blog at http://thebreenblog.blogspot.com and teaches newspaper and yearbook classes at San Benito High School. He is a reporter for The Pinnacle and former editor of the Free Lance.
