Playing games with film ratings

Wild Hogs

with John Revolting is one of the most vile films ever and
proves my point that PG 13 films can be more vulgar than R rated
movies.
The Disney Company is great at doing this. A film that should be
rated R is cut just before any single scene earns it an R. Since PG
13 films make more than most R rated films, Disney has it both
ways. So very Mickey Mouse. The pre-teens have a snicker-fest.
Playing games with film ratings

“Wild Hogs” with John Revolting is one of the most vile films ever and proves my point that PG 13 films can be more vulgar than R rated movies.

The Disney Company is great at doing this. A film that should be rated R is cut just before any single scene earns it an R. Since PG 13 films make more than most R rated films, Disney has it both ways. So very Mickey Mouse. The pre-teens have a snicker-fest.

We saw it the first day at Disney’s El Capitan on Hollywood Boulevard across from the Oscars. The El Capitan makes more money than any other single-screen theater in the United States. Even more than Hollister’s Granada.

For the $9 senior citizen discount not only do we get a first run movie but get to see a grown man play with his organ while we munch on a hot dog. Not even the Mitchell Brothers in San Francisco can beat this.

The organist brings shivers as he shakes the theater with themes from “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” “Gone With the Wind” and “As Time Goes By” from “Casablanca,” which always brings tears to my eyes. Even more tears than when I pay for the admission and the popcorn.

Luckily I have my Social Security check deposited directly to Walt Disney’s El Capitan.

When you’re in Hollywood there are three theaters that you must attend. Grauman’s Chinese Theater, the Cinerama Dome and the El Capitan will take you back to a time when going to a movie was an event.

When Al Gore invented global warming and the Internet he also came up with the Gregorian Calendar. The change was responsible for one of the strangest quirks. Only two people were ever born on March 11, and oddly both from Hollister. Me and Sally Stephenson.

Sally was blessed with the beauty of an old-fashioned movie star and the sexy voice of Lauren Bacall. But it is her great heart, beautiful smile and love of life that has her dance card full every night. Save the last dance for me, Sally, and here is hoping our special day, just the two of us in the whole wide world, will be as great as last year for me. Again I’m going down to the Senior Center just to see dependable Miss Dependable. Aye chee waa waa.

The Zodiac really frightened me as never before. Not the movie but the real Zodiac. We were living in downtown San Francisco and were warned to stay inside unless absolutely necessary to go out at night. I needed beer so at 8 p.m. after watching the chilling news accounts I go across the street for a 16-pack of Burgermeister, Falstaff, Lucky Lager or Regal Pale, whatever was on sale. When I opened the front door I noticed a car resembling the one described as the Zodiac’s. The usual San Francisco evening fog made it more chilling. I was scared. I needed beer. I walked across Post Street to Ferlin Husky’s Beer-O-Rama and all was well with the world. All four, Burgie, Falstaff, Lucky and Regal were on sale.

Last week I wrote about the newlywed couple formerly from Hollister and San Juan who waited nearly half a year before submitting their wedding photo to The Pinnacle. I suggested that maybe they wanted to make sure the marriage took. Hell, here in Hollywood they could consider that six months as most of us think of our 50th wedding anniversary.

I know the groom. Paul Silva worked in my video store in Hollister when he was going to school. Only a handful of times in a lifetime are we blessed in meeting the perfect person. Paul is that. He knows human nature better than any spiritual leader yet unlike most leaders is man enough to be part of the world rather than shelter oneself from the world. Paul has the strongest moral values of anyone I ever met but never once did I ever hear him preach or look down on those of us who possess little, if any. And with that he has given me something to drink to. Thank you Paul. I am a better person for knowing Paul and everyone that has come in contact with him is too.

I can’t wait 50 years from now – make that 50-and-a-half years – to read in the Pinnacle of Abby Rochelle and Paul Silva’s 50th wedding anniversary. Mine is next year and I hope Nancy is out of the drunk tank by then so we can drive to Hollister and celebrate at Johnny’s over a beer.

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A staff member wrote, edited or posted this article, which may include information provided by one or more third parties.

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