Finally! A solution to the gang problem
Do I have to save Hollister again? The city wants to raise your
taxes so they can have more cops to help out with the gang problem.
Not eradicate but help out. Well, I have a plan that not only will
get rid of the gang problem in Hollister but will save you
millions.
Finally! A solution to the gang problem
Do I have to save Hollister again? The city wants to raise your taxes so they can have more cops to help out with the gang problem. Not eradicate but help out. Well, I have a plan that not only will get rid of the gang problem in Hollister but will save you millions.
My neighbor here in Hollywood is the head of Skin Heads Are Us. Lodge 69, Southern California Division. He started salivating when I told him my plan. All Hollister has to do is provide some rundown house with a refrigerator full of “Ol’ Cheapo Beer” and a front lawn large enough for four pickup trucks to park. The city would provide the old beat up trucks, carefully placing Confederate flag decals on all the windows and put a dozen or so baseball bats and tire irons in the beds of said trucks. Country western cassettes would be a nice touch but optional. The city does not have to provide white women of loose morals as I explained to my neighbor that there are none in Hollister.
For two weeks deliver cases of “El Cheapo Beer” and chicken wings to said home along with toilet paper with soap being optional.
Put the Hollister Police Department on notice to stay out of town. Wait! That should be easy as their headquarters is closer to Los Banos. Leave the mean streets of Hollister to my white supremacist neighbor and associates and in less than two weeks Hollister will be rid of its gang problem and my neighbor and his buddies will be back in Hollywood working the night shift at Denny’s.
Sally Field is a great actress but as dumb as most Hollywood stars when they venture into the political arena. But when they win some statuette all of a sudden they want to impart their political wisdom on us underlings. Sally gushes with her statuette in hand, “Let’s face it. If the mothers ruled the world, there would be no God d—– wars in the first place” Really? Just in my lifetime almost every woman leader I have ever known were only too ready to go to war. Thatcher, Mier, Gandhi and Hillary Clinton also voted for war. Aye chee waa waa!
Then there is the insipid Barry Manilow who would only appear on The View if the one conservative on the show was not there. I love liberals. They are only liberal if it suits them. He could only be on The View if the one person who might express a different point of view than the other three was not able to. Now that’s liberal for you.
Happy birthday to Jack LaLanne who turned 93. Jack the fitness guru once hit me in the belly and asked, “too many tacos?” His wife at his side just smiled and said, “don’t pay attention to him. He is into fitness.”
As though we didn’t know who her famous husband was. We were on holiday in Hollywood from our home in San Francisco and we were at the Chinese Theater watching Superman II when he sat in front of us. But for me I met the real Superman, Jack LaLanne. I have not washed my belly since 1981 … something I don’t have to tell most people who meet me. Could be worse. He could have patted me on the butt.
Where’s Bobby Cruz when we need him?
Now let’s see if I have this straight. The San Benito County deputy who shot that unarmed citizen who died is now facing more charges? His past and present charges if they hold up include false imprisonment of a rape victim, one rape … er, make that two rapes, using the sheriff’s office teletype to pursue women, domestic violence, stalking, intimidating a witness, two violations of court orders forbidding domestic violence, two restraining orders, battery, brandishing a firearm and watching a female urinate. Wow! This list is longer than my Dick Tracy baton.
What really gets me about this deputy is that all day he is surrounded by a sheriff, deputy sheriffs, sheriff’s detectives and no red flags, clues or as I think of the sheriff’s department, “Clueless in San Benito County.” But they do make him a sergeant! If he only had a few more charges he could have been undersheriff. So my question to you is if the sheriff’s department has no clue just how in the hell do you expect them to find your stolen Dolly Parton eight-tracks? Dumb dee dumb dumb.
