I once had a journey similar to William Lobdell’s, though its
terrain was less lofty. As a youngster growing up in Palo Alto, I
rarely encountered the great American pastime of baseball. For some
unknown reason, it wasn’t played by my friends in the
neighborhood.
I once had a journey similar to William Lobdell’s, though its terrain was less lofty. As a youngster growing up in Palo Alto, I rarely encountered the great American pastime of baseball. For some unknown reason, it wasn’t played by my friends in the neighborhood.
When I moved to Mountain View at the age of 10, though, the sport was everywhere. Our fifth-grade teacher created a team from within our class, and we traveled to play other local schools.
The kids in my new neighborhood were fanatics, and we played so late in the summer evenings that we could barely see the ball as it was pitched in the twilight.
Years later, as a rookie teacher in Gilroy, I was allowed to coach a baseball team as part of my teaching assignment. The season wore on, and my enthusiasm for the sport waned. Eventually I grew to actively dislike it and its practitioners. Today I don’t recognize the names of contemporary baseball superstars or even watch the World Series.
William Lobdell has written a provocative and incisive book, “Losing My Religion” (Collins, 2009), which traces this pattern in his life.
However, his topic isn’t a frivolous game played for recreation, but an aspect of life that many people feel is crucial to existence – religious faith and the fate of the soul.
As a youngster growing up in Long Beach, Lobdell accompanied his family to Sunday services without any enthusiasm. His family members were conventionally Christians, but their faith had no real affect on their lives.
Lobdell tells about how he and his brother, at the end of Sunday’s liturgy, would hear the concluding words intoned by the priest, “Go in peace to love and serve the Lord.” The congregation would respond, “Thanks be go God,” and Lobdell and his brother would add, “… That church is over!” Upon reaching the age to receive the sacrament of confirmation and approaching high school graduation, he was glad when his parents let him stop attending church.
Years later, with a wife, children and all the pressures that are part of adult life, Lobdell accepted a friend’s advice and went to a worship service at an Evangelical church in Newport Beach. He found the experience strangely attractive, started studying the Bible and became involved in the congregation.
At the urging of another friend, he attended a men’s weekend retreat. By Sunday morning he experienced the “born again” phenomenon of being “saved.” He was overcome with happiness at “having Jesus in (his) heart.”
Many things happened in the following years to deepen his Christian faith. He was even able to talk the management of the Los Angeles Times into making him their principal religion writer. He looked forward to using his new position to “report objectively and respectfully about how belief shapes peoples’ lives.”
There is an old saying that people should be careful what they pray for. As his faith increased and he was preparing to take a further step toward deepening his Christian commitment, Lobdell found his reporting on religious affairs chipping away at that very faith.
A series of scandals involving a variety of Christians caused him to not only become skeptical of individual members of the faith, but to begin questioning the very grace with which he expected God to bless His church.
No one can read Lobdell’s accounts of the evil, veniality, hypocrisy, avarice and cynicism among clergy and Christian institutions he encountered without questioning how God could allow innocent people to be preyed upon by those who claim to be His representatives on earth.
Near the end of the book, Lobdell has an exchange with a Presbyterian pastor known for incredible faith and intellect, posing his doubts and considering the minister’s answers.
Eventually Lobdell realizes that he can no longer believe in an all-powerful, loving, merciful God. Many people of faith will find Lobdell’s pilgrimage of faith both interesting and a challenge to their own belief.
