A resolution she can stick with
2007 is twelve days old and I have stuck to my New Year’s
Resolution. That has to be some sort of record for me, and I think
that this time, it will actually stick. I am sure of it, in
fact.
How can that be, you ask? No one sticks to their Resolutions.
That’s why Jenny Craig wants us to call her all the time.
A resolution she can stick with
2007 is twelve days old and I have stuck to my New Year’s Resolution. That has to be some sort of record for me, and I think that this time, it will actually stick. I am sure of it, in fact.
How can that be, you ask? No one sticks to their Resolutions. That’s why Jenny Craig wants us to call her all the time.
Most of my Resolutions have been fleeting; drop a few pounds, get organized, and be a better listener. By the time January 3rd comes along, I am ignoring The Girl as she chastises me for rummaging for cookies in the disheveled pantry in the kitchen.
As I have gotten older, I have adopted Popeye’s thoughts on self-improvement. “I yam what I yam.” Or so I thought. Hence, for the first time since I learned what a Resolution is and how quickly I can break it, I decided that I would not make one this year.
In fact, with The Husband recuperating from “Alien removal” surgery this year, we didn’t go out and we didn’t even stay up to watch the Ball Drop in Times Square. I feel like I stood up my long-standing date since going way back to my teenage years, when I didn’t have a date for New Year’s Eve.
To me, New Year’s was out of sight, out of mind. Until January 1st, when I turned the TV on to be assaulted by commercials proclaiming that this is my year. I can lose 20 pounds in a week with no diet or exercise and my closets will never be a disaster again, since 2007 marks the year of the Closet Organizer.
I was a little worried. Isn’t there a law or something? You have to make at least one Resolution. I hadn’t. I had ignored New Year’s this year. Will I have seven years of bad luck? No, wait. That’s for breaking a mirror or opening an umbrella in the house. Who does that anyway? I hoped there would be no consequences.
January 2nd came and went and I still had not made a Resolution that I thought I could stick to. I was already past deadline. (In my functioning life, I never miss a deadline. Right Mr. Publisher?) It was too late. I was going to have to go blindly into 2007 without the safety net of a Resolution.
Hearing other people talk about theirs, I began to feel a little out of the loop. They all had the comfort of knowing that they had come up with something that was ludicrous and would be all but forgotten, come February. But at least they had done it.
This time, January 3rd ended with this decree- I resolved not to resolve. I had done it. No Resolution. The more I thought about it, the more comfortable I became with my late-breaking decision. I was free to raid the pantry, in the hopes of finding just one more sweet treat under a mound of half-empty (half-full?) boxes of left over crackers from Christmas platters. I was free to say, “I’m sorry, what were you saying?” to someone I am supposed to be listening to because ‘I yam what I yam.’
